Lately, it seems like the term parasocial is everywhere. By definition this is a one sided psychological bond where a media user develops a one sided connection to a media personality. Most people follow vloggers or influencers and watch their videos for information and inspiration. Others however, feel as though they know these people personally and have a stake in the decisions they make.
People do not actually have a problem with parasocial relationships. What people have a problem with is who the attention is directed towards.
Society tends to mock attachments to social media influencers while normalizing one sided devotion to athletes and traditional celebrities. If you memorize the stats of your favorite basketball player and know their life, you are “a huge fan.” If you know the same level of information about a Youtube or Tik Tok creator’s life suddenly you are “too invested.” Part of it is because society does not consider influencers as real celebrities with jobs.
Nowadays for society to consider you a celebrity there needs to be legitimacy, talent and industry backing. This is the complete opposite of influencers who are more often than not self made and internet born. Therefore, society does not consider them deserving of any kind of admiration. In reality, parasociality, regardless of who it is directed at, is strange.
Whenever you are scrolling through tik tok and you encounter a beloved celebrity, as soon as you open the comment section you will see comments like, “I feel so maternal towards this person,” or “I missed your videos so much.” There are even unsolicited criticisms of their private life.
These actions go beyond normal fan behavior and it is almost like they are mimicking real life relationships that celebrities might have with their friends and families. Fans will speak as if there is a bond between them and that celebrity that was somehow formed through a comment section.
These kinds of comments showcase how admiration can quickly turn into a sense of entitlement over their life. With some repeatedly harassing the dm’s of a celebrity asking to be booked more or to post more videos for your liking. All of this is part of parasocial behavior.
It reveals how normalized it is nowadays to project our emotions onto people we do not actually know. Regardless of whether that person is an influencer or not, that level of attachment reflects the same weird dynamic.
Parasocial relationships create a false sense of closeness which is mainly because they are one sided. One is able to judge, consume, and idolize celebrities without any real interaction being needed.
When that certain someone you idolize continues to post without discouraging the thoughts you have about them it makes you feel like what you are doing is normal; that most likely everyone does it, which is false.
In reality the lack of reciprocity is what makes your relationship with the celebrity strange. You do not know them and they do not know you, therefore there is no mutual recognition or respect which means that you should not be in the comment sections attempting to defend their honor and feel relatable to them.
