Imagine this, arguing with your “best friend” over something that was totally not your fault then it somehow the issue switches up on you. All the words out of their mouth suddenly came out of yours and the things they did are irrelevant because the one that matters is themselves. 

Having someone play the victim while being in a situation where they are totally in the wrong has to be one of the most annoying things ever. People who indulge themselves in self-victimization usually try to control others thoughts, and feelings, or they just simply try to justify their actions to others oftentimes just for attention. 

According to health psychology consultancy.wordpress.com, “People who often victimize will not seize the opportunity because they want to play the role and appear as victims to others and themselves.” 

Sometimes, when people argue, they act like they are the ones being hurt, even if it is not true. This happens because they want to protect themselves; instead of saying, “I made a mistake,” they say, “I am the victim.” This is a tactic the aggressor uses to feel better about themselves and not feel bad about what they did.

 It can be hard for them to admit they were wrong or made a mistake, so they act like they are the victims to avoid dealing with the issue. 

Rutgers student, Cheima Sahnoun shares what she thinks about people who often act like the victim.

“People with a victim mentality will always blame other people instead of self-reflecting and taking accountability in their actions,” said Sahnoun. “It has become normalized in today’s society for people to easily victimize themselves in situations and think it is okay.”

 Although people sometimes let their ego get in the way, it is okay to admit when you are wrong. To change this, people need to be aware of their actions and be ready to admit when they make a mistake. It is a way to have better relationships and become a better person overall.

No one is a victim by birth. A victim mentality is a learned behavior rather than a personality trait. 

 According to Betterup.com,  “Learned helplessness is a phenomenon in psychology where people who have traumatic experiences feel that they can not escape it, no matter what they do.” Victim Syndrome is considered a type of learned helplessness.

Dealing with someone who constantly plays the victim can be very stressful and hard. It makes the person around them question their sanity and can lead to trust issues. Instead, taking responsibility and encouraging honest communication can help stop the habit of playing the victim, allowing for real personal growth and positive conversations.